How do I tell you?

How do I tell you

that the wind no longer 

whispers underneath my wings

that the world below is slowly 

wandering through the slips 

in my fingers 

as I desperately try to close

my hands tight around 

that which keeps me here 

but to no avail-

I lose-

how do I tell you 

that my world is no longer 

a song that I used to sing 

radiating from my lips 

drunken from the depths of my heart 

that swoons the breath 

out of those that listen 

content on being born

but how do you sing, 

when you cannot breathe? 

how do I tell you 

that every morning 

I wake

gasping for breath 

struggling with some 

unknown force 

that I have no name for 

that causes me to shake and fear 

reminding me of who I am 

a misery that I do not 

want to remember. 

how do I tell you, 

you whose life is so serene 

and you, 

who does not understand 

because you have been through 

so much just to live 

how could I understand pain? 

It is nothing,

you say, 

just a passing phase, 

you’ll feel better in the morning.

but the morning comes, 

and the sun rises, 

and I cannot feel the wind. 

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